I guess it hasn’t fully sunk in yet—because it still feels so strange to say. 😅
For those of you who were watching the Awards, either in person or online, sorry again for bawling on stage, instead of giving a normal acceptance speech.
I don’t know if there are strong enough words to convey how much it means to me, but…I hoped I conveyed at least a fraction of it.
I’m going to try to do a more official and…maybe more eloquent post soon, but for now, I’m just really grateful. 💙
I’m also so happy I was able to meet some of you at GCLS! 💙
I’m missing everyone so much this week.
Huge congratulations to the other winners, as well! 💙
Oh, and I believe you can still watch the Goldie Awards on YouTube, if you missed them. 💙
Also, I haven’t been on much this month because I’ve been in a bit of a depressive episode. So, I don’t think I’ve wished you a happy Pride through the website yet.
May was Mental Health Awareness Month, and things have been so tough that I never even took a moment to talk about it. Ironic, right? 😅
If you’ve read my books (especially Goddess of the Sea or The Reign of Darkness), you know mental illness is a major theme. I try to be honest in real life (like now, for instance) about my own struggles with mental illness—because I think hiding it only increases the stigma. And I try to bring that same honesty into my books.
I believe sanitized portrayals of mental illness only hurt us. No human being responds perfectly to trauma, and fictional characters shouldn’t either. Mental illness isn’t meant to be pretty. It can be exhausting, overpowering, and scary, and some of the symptoms (the physical ones, I mean) might even be things people consider “gross.”
It’s hard to write honest portrayals of mental illness—because it often feels like no one cares about that. They just want excitement and action. On top of that, it means you’re going to see the word “unlikeable,” especially if your characters are women. People treat us this way in real life, too; they’re just a little less shameless about it.
But…someone out there is struggling and needs to feel less alone. Someone out there needs this story. That’s why we do it—even when it’s scary, even when it hurts, even when it feels like no one cares. 💚
While I was in catch-up-after-a-migraine mode, I realized there was a piece of good news I could’ve sworn I’d shared last month but didn’t. (Knowing me, it’s probably saved in drafts somewhere.)
Thank you so much to everyone who voted for it! This is the book I was most terrified to release—because I was scared people wouldn’t understand the mental illness focus or wouldn’t appreciate the mental illness focus, because I was scared of being this vulnerable, of having so much of my own trauma out there. I was just…scared. So, for people to actually like this book, it just—it makes me cry. I’m so happy. 🥹
Thank you. 💙💙💙💙
You can view the other winners at the link below. 💙
Actually, it came out two days ago, but I was nearing the end of a pretty aggressive migraine (and the start of the depression spiral that likes to tag along with it) and couldn’t think clearly enough to put the post together. 😅
I’m so excited to listen to Lindsey Dorcus’s incredibly talented narration along with you. (I just downloaded mine! 😍)
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